A woman diagnosed with breast cancer has expressed her struggle to identify as a “survivor” despite completing surgery and radiation treatments. In a heartfelt letter, she recounts her ongoing challenges, including managing scars, potential side effects from medication, and the emotional toll of her diagnosis.
Facing the Reality of Cancer
The individual, who has not been named, revealed that she feels conflicted about the term “survivor.” According to her oncologists, she should consider herself one. Yet, she describes a persistent sense of depression and fear stemming from her diagnosis. “I admit that I’m depressed,” she wrote, emphasizing that this reaction seems reasonable given the life-altering nature of cancer treatment.
While she maintains her daily routine, including personal care and social interactions, the woman finds herself overwhelmed by the focus on her illness. Conversations often revolve around her cancer, which leaves her feeling disconnected from her pre-diagnosis identity. “I’ve gone from an actual person with thoughts and interests to people only wanting to know about the cancer,” she lamented.
The Challenge of Emotional Expression
She also highlighted a societal stigma surrounding depression associated with serious illness. “The word ‘depressed’ freaks people out more than ‘cancer,’” she noted, leading her to downplay her feelings to avoid discomfort among her peers and even her healthcare providers. Her experience reflects a broader issue where individuals facing significant life challenges often feel compelled to hide their emotions.
“When did it become shameful and something that needs to be fixed when people have a true human emotion to events?”
This sentiment resonates with many who have experienced trauma or loss. The woman points out that expressing sadness or depression should not be stigmatized, especially in the context of dealing with severe health issues. She has explored various support avenues, including online and in-person groups, but found them unhelpful.
In response to her letter, advice columnist Annie Lane affirmed that feeling conflicted about the term “survivor” is valid. Lane emphasized that survival does not negate the fear or pain that accompany cancer treatment. “You’re allowed to say, ‘I’m getting through it, but it’s still hard,’” she advised, underscoring the importance of open communication about emotions.
Ultimately, the woman’s experience highlights a vital conversation about mental health, particularly for those navigating life-threatening illnesses. The need for supportive environments where individuals can express their feelings without judgment is crucial for healing and recovery.
As this woman continues her journey, her story serves as a reminder that survival encompasses more than just physical health; it also involves emotional well-being and the freedom to express vulnerability.
