A woman in Michigan is grappling with the emotional toll of her 28-year marriage to a husband she describes as a narcissist. At 67 years old, she questions whether it is too late for her to start anew after enduring years of manipulation and emotional abuse.
In her letter to the advice column “Dear Abby,” the woman details a troubling relationship characterized by gaslighting and infidelity. She recounts incidents where her husband has exhibited inappropriate behavior, including forming a close relationship with a “work wife” and flirting with a neighbor. These actions have compounded her feelings of resentment and disillusionment.
Despite sharing a home for three decades, the couple has not been intimate for more than a year. While they manage daily interactions without significant conflict, she feels trapped by his controlling nature. She notes that her husband insists on driving her everywhere, including appointments for hair and nail care, which adds to her sense of confinement.
The emotional burden is profound, leading her to seek professional help. Her psychologist has expressed confusion over her reluctance to leave the marriage, especially given that their financial situation is stable but not luxurious. The woman is left contemplating her future, unsure of the steps she should take.
In response, Abigail Van Buren, the column’s author, suggests that while the woman feels it may be too late to start over, it is crucial for her to define what a new beginning would mean. Van Buren emphasizes the woman’s right to freedom from an insecure and controlling partner. She encourages the woman to consider the guidance of her therapist as a constructive path forward.
The “Dear Abby” column, founded by Pauline Phillips and now written by her daughter, Jeanne Phillips, continues to provide advice on personal dilemmas. Readers can reach out to “Dear Abby” through www.DearAbby.com or by mail at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
As the woman weighs her options, she reflects on her emotional well-being and the possibility of reclaiming her independence. The journey toward self-discovery and empowerment may be challenging, but it is never too late to seek a fulfilling life outside of a toxic relationship.
